Forty

A Little Cream

      “Why would I have a problem with it?” Duo asked like it was a stupid question...which it sort of was...but Quatre hadn’t been around us as much...well. He’d been there like once every two months...so it was a dumb question...keeping in mind that he did know Duo.
      “What did you want, Duo?” I asked, pulling away from Quatre and leading them both inside. I pulled my T-shirt back on and handed Quatre his shirt as the two men sat down on the sofa.
      “Did you hear the gunshots?” Duo asked us.
      “Gunshots?” Quatre said blankly.
      “Guess not. Anyway, Heero sort of mangled the bathroom door in his room.”
      “With his gun?” I asked.
      “Apparently, Nikki wouldn’t unlock the bathroom door and he got impatient.” Duo explained with that slightly knowing grin he’d been wearing off and on since Nikki and Heero’d been arguing...which I now recognized. He’d somehow found out about Nikki and Heero’s nightly activities...
      “Huh...” Quatre grunted, distracted.
      I went to the sideboard and poured three cups of tea, adding a shot of vodka to each of them. I judiciously added another shot to my own cup.
      “I don’t like tea.” Duo reminded me as I tried to give him a cup.
      I pressed it on him, “Trust me, you’ll like this tea. I modified it.”
      “Oh,” he said, taking a dubious sip, “Oh!” Recognition dawned in a startled face...recognition along with pleasure.
      I laughed, handing Quatre his cup. I sat down next to him and set in on my own tea. “What was that you were saying about cream, Duo?” I asked.
      “What? Oh. After you two left, Wufei remarked that Heero and Quatre looked like cats who had gotten into the cream, and Heero admitted it.” he was still smirking.
      “Hmm...” I said, looking at Quatre. “So now I’m both the kitten and the cream?”
      Quatre blushed and gulped down his tea. And coughed.
      “What’s in this?” he demanded.
      “Vodka, unless my tongue died when I wasn’t looking,” Duo quipped. “So the tom cat has a little kitten to play with? How adorable.”
      “So why were you in such a hurry to tell us about Heero’s maturity problems?”
      “Umm...Nikki was in the bathroom at the time?” he said pointedly.
      “Heero is a lot of things, including immature, but a bad aim isn’t one of them.” I remarked sagely.
      “Hmm. I at least thought Quatre might want to get the door repaired.”
      “You know what, Duo? There’s a phone in your room. Use it to call the butler yourself.” I said brusquely and turned to Quatre, “Drink your tea, Dear.”
      Duo wasn’t gone yet, so I pointed to the door.
      “Door,” I said, “Beyond which lies hallway, in which is another door, leading to a room known as Duo’s. Simple directions; you should be able to find it.”
      “Maybe the tea would be better with some cream and sugar...” Duo suggested with a wink. Then he left and shut the door behind him.
      When he had gone, I finished my tea and headed toward the bed, dropping articles of clothing as I went.
      “What are you doing?” Quatre asked, looking appreciative.
      “Picking up where we left off,” I replied, “Were you going to join me, or shall I just take a nap?”
      “Who could refuse an offer like that?” he remarked, heading for the bed.


      I stepped into the hallway, smirking.
      So, Quatre had gotten into the cream...but he hadn’t expected it to bite back.
      I saw Kris’s door closing and decided to find some cream of my own.
      I took the distance to her door in three steps and knocked.
      “Who is it?” she called.
      “It’s Duo.” I called back.
      Silence.
      “Kris...”
      “Leave me alone, Duo.”
      So much for cream...
      I opened her door, stepped inside, and closed it.
      She was sitting on her bed, about to clean her gun...which she quickly leveled it at me.
      I crossed the room and guided her hand to the nightstand.
      She sighed and set the gun down. I decided to take no chances and tossed it into a corner.
      “What’s wrong?” I asked, tracing her jaw with a finger.
      She batted my hand away, “You mean other than that you just walked in here after I told you not to?” she said sarcastically.
      “Mm-hmm...” I confirmed.
      “Wufei made Sam and Nikki cry. Heero’s being a complete ass, and...” she broke off mid-sentence, looking at me, then away.
      “And?” I prompted gently, thinking I knew the answer, wondering how I should feel exactly...
      “And you’re leaving...” she whispered.
      “Absence makes the heart grow fonder...” I grinned at her, hoping she wouldn’t cry...I hated it when a woman cried...How in the hell did a person deal with a crying woman? Especially if they were crying for you...
      “Yeah, and proximity puts it all back into perspective...” she said, pushing me away playfully.
      “Hey!” I dove past her into the bed, grabbing a pillow. “Get ready to defend yourself!” I laughed, hoping I’d distracted her enough.
      She laughed and picked up another pillow, shielding herself with it as I thwacked my pillow at her. She swung hers at me, but I caught the pillow, moving my hand across it to take her hands in mine.
      She was so beautiful, flushed with laughter, her eyes dancing. I pulled her to me, unable to help myself. I kissed her forehead gently.
      “Duo...” she smiled, looking up at me through her eye lashes.
      I leaned down to kiss her mouth, but missed as she turned her head.
      “Kris...” I pleaded.
      I found her mouth this time, and her arms reached up to twine around my neck.
      “Kris...” I breathed, but got no further as she passionately returned my kiss.


      Sam must have been with Quatre. I shut my door behind myself and sat down to clean my gun.
      There was a knock on the door, “Who is it?” I called, wondering.
      “It’s Duo.” the braided pilot’s voice came from the other side of the door.
      What did he want? The memories of the morning brought a smile to my lips, followed rapidly by a frown. What did they think they were doing, leaving us behind here? I had no right to be surprised by the news, though, because I’d helped them plan, but still...
      “Kris...”
      “Leave me alone, Duo.” I called through the door, annoyed.
      There was a slight pause and the door opened and closed. I leveled my gun at approximately his head level as I turned.
      He didn’t hesitate, he crossed the room in four steps and held my hands with his own, guiding them to the nightstand. Oh well, I wouldn’t have been able to use it on him anyway. He grabbed it and tossed it to the corner.
      “What’s wrong?” he ran his finger along my jaw. I smacked the hand away, the last thing I needed was to lose myself.
      “You mean other than you just walked in here after I told you not to?” I demanded sarcastically.
      “Mm-hmm...” he seemed to not recognize my sarcasm.
      “Wufei made Sam and Nikki cry. Heero’s being a complete ass, and...” I stopped, confused slightly, meeting his eyes a moment and not being able to hold them.
      “And?” he prompted.
      “And you’re leaving.” I whispered as realization hit.
      He grinned, “Absence makes the heart grow fonder.”
      I snorted slightly, not surprised, “Yeah, and proximity puts it all back into perspective.” I shoved him slightly.
      Suddenly, he dove past me and grabbed a pillow, “Get ready to defend yourself!”
      I laughed, grabbing another pillow and shielding myself. Quickly I moved to counter attack.
      He caught my pillow and moved his hands across it to take mine. The look in his eyes was one I’d never seen before and he kissed me on the forehead.
      “Duo.” I smiled, we were so close that I could feel his heartbeat.
      He leaned down, his mouth moving near mine and I turned my head.
      “Kris...” his voice was pleading.
      I didn’t resist as his mouth met mine, but reached up and twined my arms around his neck.
      “Kris...” he breathed and I returned his kiss, not letting him say any more.


      Someone tapped the door and I could feel Heero shift.
      “Nikki?” Kat’s voice carried hesitantly through.
      “It’s open.” Heero called, pulling the blankets up over me more.
      Kat was a bit hesitant to come in, she stopped and glared at him, “What the fuck did you think you were doing?” she shut the door.
      She was probably trying to figure out what I was on...so to speak...since we’ been arguing earlier and now...
      He pursed his lips a second, thinking, “Uhh...”
      “That sounds awfully intelligent.”
      He frowned at her, “Okay. I was wrong. I know...”
      She nodded, “To say the least. What the hell did you think you’d prove?”
      “I wanted to talk to her...”
      “You can hear me talking to Trowa when the doors are closed and we’re whispering...one door isn’t going to make her not be able to hear you.”
      “I know. I wanted to talk face to face...”
      She nodded again, “So you fall back on your gun. You’re training has to be used for something, doesn’t it.”
      He shook his head, “Just stop. I know I fucked up. You’re only going to piss me off.”
      She laughed emptily at that, “Is that supposed to be a threat?”
      He shook his head, not saying anything, glaring.
      I sighed, deciding to stop this, “What’s going on?”
      She rolled her eyes, turning to look at me, “We’re going to have a formal lunch...”
      Heero continued to glare at her and she started to get unnerved...he had intense eyes. They got to anyone if he stared too long.
      “Stop.” I murmured, elbowing him.
      He chuckled and started to watch me.
      I was glad he was able to move on.
      I propped myself up on my elbows, “Thanks, Kitty. What time?” I started stroking my hand across Heero’s lower stomach under the blankets without letting Kat see.
      Heero froze, swallowing.
      “At noon.” she replied, focusing on me and also moving on.
      I moved my hand lower on Heero’s stomach and I could feel slight tremors sweep through him. “All right...What are you going to wear?”
      “There’s this dress, it’s like...that black one I wore to prom, you know?” her naiveté was starting to show, and I was moving my hand lower.
      I nodded, “The one with the gold trim?”
      She nodded back, “It’s like that, only strappy. What are you going to wear?”
      Heero made a noise in the back of his throat as I moved my hand off his abdomen, stroking faster.
      It carried to Kat, who tried to ignore it...naive about some things, yes, but as for noises and games...
      “I found a floor length summer dress. It’s...well, not really a summer dress,” I tried not to grin as his breathing went harsher, “But it’s that style...sort of...hmm...I don’t know how to explain it.” I was purposefully drawing out my description, hoping not to embarrass her, “Anyways, its dark blue with black flowers. It’s more formal than summer, it’s nice.”
      Realizing my intent, Heero tried to pull away.
      “I’ll just have to see it...” she said and I nodded.
      Kat decided to let me know she knew I was being naughty. Her eyes opened wide in a ‘spare me’ sort of way.
      I grinned.
      Heero wasn’t succeeding in moving away...in fact, he wasn’t succeeding to do anything but create more friction.
      I winked at her, not stopping.
      She rolled her eyes as he made another noise...more protesting.
      She left, giving me a look.
      I sighed, pulling the blankets off and sitting up.
      Heero sat up, moving to hold me, and I stood up.
      Realization lit his face, “You’re a cruel woman...” he was still breathing jagged and his voice was airy.
      “And you leaving me isn’t?” I demanded in turn.
      “Nikki, you know I have to do this.”
      “Just when were you planning on telling me?”
      “Last night...”
      “No. Did it even cross your mind after you gave me the ring back?” I watched him, seeing his slight shame, “I didn’t think so...”
      “Well, what d’you expect? I was distracted.” That was a bit annoyed.
      “I don’t want you to go.”
      “I didn’t want Wufei to tell you. He had no tact...”
      I raised an eyebrow, “Him? How about you and your, ‘We’ll fight ‘til we’re done’?”
      He looked away, “I had to tell you then. I was going to wait ‘til after lunch and have you tell the girls...”
      “Do you realize how much of an ass that makes you sound like? They have names, Heero. They were given those names for a reason.”
      “Nikki...What am I supposed to say?” he shook his head.
      I glared at him.
      “I will be back. So will the others.”
      That made me feel a little better. He always kept this sort of promise...I had been scared when he’d left after finding out Relena had disappeared, and Duo’s just walking off didn’t help, ‘specially since I’d been crying...that usually worked...but he’d come back then...
      “It won’t take long. Because if worst comes to worst...” he went on.
      I sighed. “I can’t stay mad at you...”
      He stood up and enfolded me in his arms, a slight smile playing on his lips, “That’s not exactly a bad thing...”
      I managed a weak smile.
      “Nikki, I...” he hesitated as he looked down at me and I could feel his guilt.
      Knowing what he was looking at, I touched the gash. He still felt guilt for that? Well, I hadn’t told him I forgave him...he knew...didn’t he?
      “I love you.” he murmured finally.
      I rested my head against his chest, “I love you too.”


      I felt guilt as I looked down at her, focusing on the gash, “Nikki, I...” another wave of guilt stopped me.
      She was...so vulnerable...with all her games...you would think she wasn’t at all... but...I would protect her. Her hand touched the gash and I realized she’d sensed my guilt.
      “I love you.” I told her, wanting her to know the truth. The truth Trowa had reminded me of...he couldn’t really not trust me...not if he knew how I felt about her...I shoved that away.
      “I love you too.” she replied, resting her head on my chest.
      I smiled slightly, “I do have to come back, you know.”
      I could feel her confusion.
      “I have to come back to be forgiven. Until you forgive me...”
      “But, Heero, I...” she looked up quickly.
      “Shh...” I covered her mouth with my hand, “I swear to you I’ll come back. But if you forgive me now...I can’t keep that promise...” shaking my head, I removed my hand.
      After a time, she nodded, understanding.
      “Do you know how hard it was for me? With you gone...Nikki...I never told you, but I’ve loved you for...so long...” I thought about it, “And those nights...all that I said...”
      “Shh...” she murmured.
      I met her eyes, searching, “When I said shit, it was because I was hurt and scared that I’d lose you. Making you angry at me...so you’d stay and argue with me...not leave...”
      She kissed me softly and I crushed her to me, “I will be back. I swear it.”
      I felt tears and she pulled back to look at me, “Is it all right if I’m scared...”
      I smiled slightly at her, “I would be disappointed if you weren’t...”
      She smiled, sighing, “If you don’t come back, I’ll kill you...”
      I grinned at that and she smiled in return.
      She reached up and rested a hand on my cheek a second, then disengaged herself from me and headed for the bathroom.
      I lay back on the bed, covering myself. Poor Kat. I didn’t hold it against her for bitching at me. I’d deserved that at least...I really shouldn’t have shot the door open.
      I smiled, when Nikki’s hand had started gliding across my stomach, I knew that Kat would freak if I let her finish it...she may not be completely innocent, but she wasn’t coarse either.
      Shame on Nikki.
      Why wasn’t I more worried about Romefeller? They had the potential to take over Earth and the colonies. Of course, after we got through with them, they would maybe have enough left for a museum display...if they were lucky.
      That was why. That was why I wasn’t totally overcome with this mission. I had sworn to Nikki, and thus to the girls...Sam, Kris, and Kat, that we would all return safely.
      We would.
      I sat up and headed for the bathroom, Nikki might need someone to wash her back.


      I lay in Quatre’s bed, listening to him breathe as he drowsed, sprawled on top of me. I could feel his soft breath on my neck, feel his heart beat against my chest. I wrapped my arms around him and lay my cheek against his bright hair.
      “Mmm...” he mumbled, rousing a little and brushing his lips across my throat.
      I loved him.
      I loved him, and I hated myself for it.
      I had been playing with him until now. He had been only a toy, like so many others before him.
      I hadn’t planned to break his heart, but had known from experience that I eventually would.
      Only now...now I couldn’t bear the thought of being separated from him for the scant twenty-four hours he would be gone.
      There was something about Quatre that made me feel guilty, afraid I might tarnish the golden sheen of his soul. He was a man like any other, and yet different. Better than most. There was also that about him which made him wholly mine. I couldn’t fathom a reason for it, didn’t understand it...
      But at that moment, I thanked God for it, and knew I always would.
      Disgusted with myself for falling in love with one of the reckless Gundam pilots, I crawled out from under him, gathered up my clothing, and headed for my own room. A hand on my bare shoulder stopped me.
      “Sam...” he started.
      “I’ll talk to you in a minute, Quatre.” I didn’t turn around, couldn’t bear to meet his eyes...
      I went to my room and shut the door behind me.
      I got dressed mechanically, washed my face, sat down in a chair. I stared at the floor a long time, wondering what to do, wondering what Quatre would think or want or do. There was a knock at Quatre’s door. At the other. I groaned.
      “Who is it?” I called, rising from my chair.
      “Who do you think?” Quatre sounded annoyed.
      “Trowa.” came Trowa’s voice from the hall.
      “Just a minute, Trowa.” I called back, opening the door for Quatre.
      I gave him a flat look and opened the other door for Trowa.
      I walked to the closet and started rifling through my clothes, muttering under my breath about rosy, overprotective men.
      Where is my pink leopard skirt...
      I whirled to face the two men, thoroughly frustrated with everything.
      “What do you want?” I snapped.
      Both of them looked confused, Trowa surprised, Quatre hurt. I was immediately sorry, and I bit my lip, turning away in shame. I sighed and my shoulders slumped.
      Comforting arms wrapped around me in an awkward bear-hug. I collapsed into the embrace, and pushed my way out of it when I realized it wasn’t Quatre, but Trowa.
      “Sam,” Trowa said softly, “Are you all right? Is everything okay?”
      I sighed, not sure what to say, “I’m fine, thank you, Trowa.”
      “Okay. I just came by to tell you we’re sort of dressing up for lunch, since Relena’s eating with us. Kitty thought I should warn you.”
      “Hmm...That was nice of her.” I answered, “What’s she wearing, do you know?”
      “A dress.”
      I gave him an arch look.
      He smiled, “I think she said something about prom...” he trailed off.
      “And what are you going to wear?”
      “This?”
      “Wrong. Let Kat pick something for you.” I laughed at him.
      “Okay.” he smiled, “You’re sure you’re all right?”
      “Yeah.”
      “Okay.” he looked once more at Quatre, questioning, before he turned and left.
      I sighed and turned to face Quatre.
      He looked lost, like someone who had missed ten minutes of a movie he’d been watching, trying to figure out what’s going on in front of him.
      I smiled sheepishly and began toying with his shirt collar.
      “Whatever you wear, Love, make sure you and I match.” I told him.
      “What?” he captured my hands, making me meet his eyes. “What’s going on?”
      He was having trouble adjusting to my rapid changes in mood. I held his gaze and squeezed his hands gently.
      “Nothing.” I smiled, “All better. Now, what are you going to wear?”
      I freed myself from his hands and went to the closet. I dug around until I found a light green dress. It was floor-length, spaghetti-strapped, and backless. The light crepe material was patterned with darker green vines and tiny carnelian-colored flowers.
      I held it up in front of myself as I turned back to Quatre, “What do you think?”
      “What could I possibly wear to match that?” he demanded playfully.
      “Go pick something out while I put this on.” I laughed at him.
      I was already half undressed by the time the door to his room shut behind him. I set to work on dressing, all the while trying to get used to being in love.

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Kyeian